Running

I caught myself screaming at my daughter the other day about running around the house for no reason.

No one is chasing you.
You’re running around in circles, therefore you aren’t actually trying to get anywhere.
This is not gym class and you are not exercising because if you are, jumping jacks are just as effective.
You’re running to drive me crazy.

It must be a phase, because then after sitting down I asked her to turn off the light. Which to her translated into “run quickly and damn near tackle the light switch. Oh and extra points if your head doesn’t bust through the wall.” Then she turned back toward me and ran back, and believe me when I say that the distance from the lightswitch to the sofa is nowhere near sufficient enough for running. I was honestly afraid for a moment that I was going to get hurt.

I look to myself to figure these things out. I don’t run randomly, well not literally. I have never leapt from the sofa and sprinted to the lightswitch. I almost never jog 10 laps around the living room.

I do run from and over things though. Not only am I constantly in a hurry, in a mad rush to get something completed or to get somewhere, in my mind I run away from those things that I don’t want to either accept or face just as quickly and simply as she does to turn off a light. Other times, I run frantically toward things that could very well knock my ass out.

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I was discussing with a friend why we seem to be wrapped up in the things that we are currently. Why we constantly try to run from the situation and end it daily; why we ended up in this race in the first place. I can only conclude that maybe it is the running that keeps us going. If it were easy and didn’t require the running, we would’ve been done and left it at the side of the road a long time ago. Running away from and being pulled back. Giving up and reconsidering. Running for some imaginary prize that makes us look back and think, “man I’m glad I ran my ass off.” Or maybe just realizing that in the end it’s a fantastic lap in this track meet of life. Exhausting. Emotional. Sometimes, we want to just sit down in the middle of the race and quit. Sometimes, like my daughter, we just need to sit our asses down and be quiet. For just a moment.

No one is chasing me.
I’m running around in circles, therefore I’m not actually trying to get anywhere.
This is not gym class and I am not exercising because if I am, jumping jacks are just as effective.
I’m running to drive you crazy.

And me…quite possibly.