I’m not particularly judgmental. I try not to be. I feel like I am temporarily allowed to judge since the GBE 2 prompt this week is “judgment” which I interpret as meaning “do what you want.”
1. You Are Bad At Dating
Jason Dean decided that the best way to get Rebecca to [...]
I was going to vlog for my 28th 38th birthday yesterday, but last night I found myself sitting on my bed looking like a psychopathic-sitting-on-a-bed-lady. Not a good picture for a vlog. Don’t get me wrong, 38 is probably going to be just as amazing as 0-37, but I found myself in a place I [...]
Dear Tooth Fairy
Dear tooth fairy,
I lost one of my teeth today and I dropped it in the seat belt thing and I can’t get it out. Can I still have some money?
From <daughter’s full name>
Dear <daughter’s name>
I didn’t have any cash on me anyway because I only carry a debit card [...]
When I first moved here, I worked for a telemarketing company that paid bonuses in silver dollars.
One evening I carried a handful of bonuses to the Rural Small Town convenience store to purchase a pizza and probably Doritos and the teenage clerk tells me…
“We don’t accept foreign money,” as if I ended up [...]
Howdy Doody Was Totally Creepy
Usually, people are afraid of something because of a bad experience. Scared of the dark? Maybe someone jumped out and scared the hell out of you once. Scared of heights? Maybe you fell off something really high at one time.
I just realized that doesn’t make sense. I don’t like heights and I’ve never fallen [...]
I knew a girl that ate her ear wax. And no she wasn’t a little kid. Ear wax is like ear dirt, right? There has to be some reason eating ear wax is unhealthy.
I remember seeing her engage in this habit after a night of clubbing. We would get a sammy (of probably pickle [...]
The Letter A
Day one of the A to Z Blogging Challenge and to tell you the truth the only letter “A” word I could think of was Asshole. I’m not angry at anyone and I’m not thinking of any particular person. I have no idea why it kept popping into my head, except that I think it’s [...]
Well, after being screamed at by a lady for turning around in her driveway this morning, I realized we all have days like these where it seems like we’re not the Greatest Mom in the World. We do, right?
Rewind. It isn’t because I used someone’s driveway to turn around that I’m less than the [...]
yet with possibility and reality somewhere visible.
otherwise it only makes me wonder…
…who wishes for things they can’t ever have anyway?
Facebook Owes Me a Friend. A Hot One.
I wrote up a quick article on How to Spot a Fake Facebook Friend just so I could link it to here (I never write for AC anymore, unless I have something completely useless to say, so I suggest you check it out).
Before I proceed I should acknowledge that this blog [...]
I have half a mind to delete the last post regarding “What I Mean When I Say I Love You” and it’s only because of the mission I’ve dedicated myself to that I didn’t press the big deleticus button like five seconds after it published. What mission? I have a couple currently with a handful [...]
Maybe the title is too aggressive. I actually feel kind of bad making fun of a dead television.
Especially when it’s not really dead. That’s kind of like laughing at Big Celebrity Died but Didn’t Really Die on the internet. You know what I mean. Last week it was Dennis Hopper. (I didn’t laugh, by [...]
How to Pick a BFF
Me: Who is your best friend at school?
DD: Mr. S, Miss B. and Mr. I. But most of all, Mr. S.
Me: Really? Why Mr. S most of all?
DD: Because he smells good. I can smell him when he walks by.
Because this is how we all should choose our best friends, right? [...]
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